Jack’s Birth Story
This is Jack’s birth story.
On Friday January 22nd, I woke up feeling weird. I was uncomfortable, crampy, achy and tired. It felt like I had constant and semi-intense period cramps all day long. I remembered feeling similar the day before I went into labor with Luca so I had a feeling baby was coming soon. I shared my feelings with Ryan and my in-laws, who were staying with us to be with Luca when we went to the hospital, and texted my mom and sister that something was happening. My mom was funny because she kept saying “time them!” or “how far apart are the cramps?” I was adamant that they weren’t contractions but I knew my body was preparing for labor.
The day passed with the continued cramps and the same tired feeling. I don’t like to take a break or let other people do things for me (#controlissues) but that day I could barely walk around. As I was prepping dinner I asked my mother-in-law to take over because I had to lay on the couch. She joked that she’s never seen me just lay down before so I must really be uncomfortable. And I was! I ate a little bit for dinner — I was NOT hungry but knew I needed to eat — and then got Luca ready for bed. I hugged and rocked him in my arms longer than usual in an attempt to memorize how small he felt. I knew when I returned home with the baby Luca was going to feel so big to me. I’d been a mess of emotions for weeks but that whole day was filled with both excited and nervous anticipation.
Ryan and my in-laws started a movie around 9:00 but I opted to go to bed early in case my contractions started overnight. I took a shower, laid in bed around 9:30 and quickly fell asleep. I woke up around 12:30 with my first contraction. It was a dull pain but a clear contraction and was quickly followed by another one. I laid in bed for an hour and a half and timed the contractions. They were pretty consistent, increasing in intensity and coming about 2 minutes apart. I woke up Ry at this point and told him I was definitely in labor and I think I should call the doctor.
I had my 38 week appointment a couple of days before and talked with the midwife about going to the hospital when I was uncomfortable rather than in pain because I had such a quick labor with Luca (6 hours from first contraction to meeting Luca). I called the doctor’s office around 2:30 when I was super uncomfortable. The on-call nurse took my information and said the delivering midwife would call me back. She called me back 15 minutes later and told me to come to hospital and labor there in case things progressed as quickly as with my first. I put a few last minute things in my hospital bag as Ry finished packing his (he refused to pack early for both babies LOL) and then put my bag and the car seat by the door. Ry woke his parents to let them know we were leaving and I went into Luca’s room to rub him on the back and say bye (this was super emotional for me and I cried when I was in there). Ry packed the car up and I was about to get in when I realized I didn’t have my phone. We looked through the trunk, all the bags, my jacket, our room, where I thought I left it and we could not find it! Ry looked all around the house until he found it by Luca’s bedroom door. I totally forgot I put it on the ground when I went in there and since I told Ry I wasn’t going into Luca’s room, he didn’t think to look there in the beginning. But with that mystery solved we were on our way to the hospital!
We arrived at the hospital around 3:30, put on our masks (this was strange!) and headed in. Once our temperatures were taken and Ry cleared the Covid questions, they put us in a OB emergency room where I was hooked up to a baby monitor and checked for dilation. The hospitalist informed me I was only 4cm dilated and I was so frustrated. The contractions were painful and close together, I wanted to be further along than 4cm. At this point I was still comparing this labor with Luca’s and it was putting me in a weird headspace. Labor is just as much a mental marathon for me as it is a physical one, so I paced the room while breathing through the contractions and forced myself into a calmer and more positive headspace focused on THIS labor.
The hospitalist came back in to check me after an hour or so (I walked the entire time), and I was still at 4. They saw some pretty intense contractions on the monitor and those combined with my precipitous/rapid labor with Luca, they decided to admit me (praise!). I was legitimately concerned that I would end up giving birth in the car so I was very relieved when they didn’t send me home. They did a rapid Covid test on me and after receiving a negative result, we were transferred to a labor and delivery room around 6:00. Once my Covid test was negative, I was permitted to take my mask off in the L&D room. Ry still had to wear his when there were nurses/doctors in the room and all the nurses and doctors wore one but thankfully I did not have to labor or deliver with a mask on my face.
I met with the L&D nurse to go over my birth plan — a low intervention, unmedicated labor and delivery. She asked me how sure I was on not wanting an epidural because she was ending her shift and had to mark it down. I told her 95%.. I did it once so I figured I could do it again but would leave 5% just in case. It’s not that I’m opposed to epidurals or pain management, I just don’t like feeling out of control and wanted to really feel each stage of labor like I did with Luca’s birth. I knew I could rely on my mind and body to get me through the labor journey unassisted. I mentioned that labor is very much a mental marathon for me and the headspace I’m in is just as important as the labor positions to get through each contraction. During each contraction, I have this mantra that I chant in my mind — my baby isn’t hurt and isn’t hurting me, I’m not hurt or hurting my baby (this is important because the pain is so intense your brain is like something must be wrong), each contraction just brings us closer to meeting and we are working together towards that goal.
I walked around the room (walking lessens the pain for me) until the new nurse (Holly, bless her!) came in to check on me. We talked through different moves to help labor progress and she said the OB would be in to check my dilation shortly. The OB (one of my favorites!) came in around 8:00 and I was dilated to 6 and 80% effaced. The contractions were intense and I really wanted to speed things up so when she asked if I wanted her to break my water, I said “yes, please!” She said that the contractions would be more painful but it would definitely speed things up – I barely registered the more painful part, I just wanted to meet my baby. When she broke my water, a little pop! and then water leaking, there was meconium in it. She explained because of this there would be special nursery doctors and nurses in the room to check on baby after I delivered. I didn’t think anything of it because I knew the baby was okay but Ry was super freaked out because there was nothing he could do.
The contractions were immediately more painful and I was feeling a ton of pain in my back. The nurse encouraged me to use the peanut ball to help open my cervix so I rocked on that for a bit while she applied pressure to my hips and Ry pushed on my lower back. Both the hip and lower back pressure helped lessen the pain of the contractions and the back pain. After a few contractions, she asked if I wanted to use the tub — each L&D room has a big soaking tub that you can use during labor but they don’t allow water births — I agreed because I thought that the hot water would help with the pain but I was so wrong! As soon as I sat in the tub the contractions were so painful I could barely breath. I was also still wearing the portable baby monitor and it was awkward to maneuver around. Ry was on the outside of the tub holding the other end of the monitor and after about 5 minutes in the tub I told him I HAD to come out. He pulled me out and as we were trying to dry me off, I felt an urgent need to push. I yelled for Ry to press the button for the nurse and when they answered I yelled, “I HAVE TO PUSH!!” Within seconds the room was bustling with nurses readying me and the room for delivery and the extra nursery doctors and nurses — there were so many people but it somehow didn’t feel like it like in the moment. Ry and the nurse who’d been assisting me helped me on to the hospital bed and in that semi-sitting position I felt like the baby was on the left side. The nurse was on my left side so I grabbed onto her and pushed against her as the contractions hit. I felt so bad I kept apologizing but she was so supportive!
My OB was in position to deliver but checked me and I wasn’t at 10 cm yet. It was so hard to sit there through the contractions and need to push without pushing but after a few minutes I was at a ten and could finally push. I pushed the next contraction — I was so relieved to be pushing because I knew the contractions would be over soon and for me active labor/transition contractions are a worse pain than the actual pushing. I think it’s probably a mental thing as well because I don’t think about the pain of pushing, I just focus on getting. the. baby. out. I pushed through three contractions and baby was out! He didn’t make any noise and I heard them say the cord was wrapped but I just knew he was okay.
Now that I can look back on the experience, I should have been freaked out by both the meconium and the cord, I’m sure it seems weird that I wasn’t. I mentioned before that I don’t like feeling out of control and this whole labor and birth tested that. It really forced me to give up control, to just be in the moment and trust my body. And I can’t explain it but my heart knew he was okay. Maybe it was the connection we had since the beginning (you can read about how I knew he was Jack on in this Instagram post) or maybe it was calm mental space I was in; whatever it was I’m so thankful for the knowledge and feeling.
I looked to see if it was a boy or a girl and said “it’s a boy!” completely stealing Ry’s thunder (I feel so guilty about this). But I couldn’t hold it back and Ry was still so freaked out about the cord and was waiting for movement and/or sound from the baby before saying anything. They unwrapped the cord, suctioned his mouth and he cried out right away. My OB handed him to me and he was absolutely perfect!!! Every memory of the pain drifted away as I snuggled my baby close and inhaled his scent. Meeting your baby for the first time is actual heaven on Earth. There are no words or language that can accurately and emphatically describe what it feels like and I am forever thankful for the opportunity to experience pregnancy and birth.
Our Jack Wolf Diehl was born at 9:38 in morning on January 23, 2021. His birth was slow but quick, intense but relaxed, eventful but calm and I would do it again a million more times. I’m so thankful for the experience and a healthy baby.
